Woe.

Here I am again, stunned and longing for an unknown reason. And lately, I’ve been asking myself if I’m really happy or I’m just dissimulating. And I get to the point where I’m already thinking that my life is fine, I have everything I need and want, I have a whole family and friends but then I realized that even though I have all that, there is still something missing in my heart…that seems not to be filled by anyone and hard to achieve. I feel like there is an excessive amount of gloom inside me and I can’t openly relinquish it. I need to completely free myself from whatever sort of sorrow I’ve been clutching for such a long time. I have attempted every day to liberate myself from the distress that has consistently been in me yet for reasons unknown, it never goes away. I never opened it up to my family or friends because I didn’t want to make them feel like they didn’t do everything just to make me happy … and I’m afraid they might not understand or they might just ignore the despondency in my heart. So I ended up being alone and dealing all of these with my own. I have no choice but to be okay.